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Zen And The Art Of Parenting

June 10, 2019 By James Espy Leave a Comment

In Asian philosophy, there is the concept of “the path” (道).  If one follows the path one can achieve enlightenment.  What enlightenment means varies depending on the philosophy (Taoism versus Buddhism, for instance).  Boiled down, the path is simply applying some form of deep engagement to an activity. Many arts—such as flower arrangement, archery, painting […]

Fear Of Fear Itself

May 28, 2019 By James Espy Leave a Comment

Public discourse sure has changed in recent years.  Once, leaders offered stirring eloquence and soaring oratory to persuade hearts and minds.  Now, we have tweets and grade school insults.  To really grasp the significance of this shift, consider FDR’s first inaugural address.  Elected three years into the Great Depression, he was tasked with leading a […]

Being Disappointed With Your Child

April 29, 2019 By James Espy Leave a Comment

As parents, we can get disappointed with our kids. They may perform below their potential or behave in a way that undermines our expectations of them. Kids are imperfect beings who are still learning the basic rules of life, so they will fall short.

Failure to meet our expectations in some way is almost inevitable for children. How we respond to, and then express, our disappointment to them can have profound and lasting consequences.

Confidence Is Overrated!

April 22, 2019 By James Espy 2 Comments

Which is more important—to speak with confidence to your child or to speak accurately? Sometimes it is so much easier to tell your child what they want to hear or even just tell them whatever it takes to get some peace and quiet. And speaking as if you know what your talking about can often seem to increase your child’s confidence in what you are saying.

But does it? Do these inaccuracies have an impact on your relationship with your child? In this article, I explore the tension between speaking with authority and with accuracy, as well as the consequences to you parenting effectively.

A Strategy For Managing Your Child’s Screen Use

March 4, 2019 By James Espy Leave a Comment

I’ve written on this blog before about screen use and its impact on children. The inspiration for this has been twofold.  First, observation of students in our martial arts school.  I have noticed in recent years that children with behavioral issues and difficulty with focus often engage in frequent and regular use of screens.  Since […]

Teaching Your Child Honesty

February 4, 2019 By James Espy Leave a Comment

Truth appears to be in decline.  Even the meaning of the word “fact” seems to be open to debate. In a society where those in positions of authority and prestige are increasingly comfortable with not only deception, but blatant—even comical—lies, we find ourselves drowning in a sea of untruth.  It can be very disorienting. And […]

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